What words of comfort are best for those thoughts and feelings? She may revisit certain stages, skip some, or experience other “stages” (some experts say there are up to twelve).Īs her friend, it is important for you to know that all of these feelings are normal and acceptable. The grieving person may or may not go through all of these stages of grief. The years that you planned for that will never happen.Įlisabeth Kübler-Ross referenced five stages of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. You may feel regret for all of the time that you have lost with your loved one. You may lose relationships with “couples.” You may also lose friendships with the spouse’s side of the family. You may not just be losing your spouse, but you may lose friendships as well. Why didn’t God intervene on your loved one’s behalf? Did you do everything possible to help your loved one? Why didn’t the doctors do more? These are all valid questions, and furthermore, it is “Ok” to be angry. This might be anger at God, with your loved one, with yourself, or with the doctors. It is natural and normal to grieve and to hurt when someone you love dies. Some people have described it as feeling like “being cut in two.” It might feel as if you have lost a piece of yourself. What is the grieving person thinking and feeling right now? Outside input can break through those cycles that often lead to depression and stagnation. Your words can help by turning that monologue into something more of a dialogue. If the internal monologue is all they have, it will be very difficult for them to grieve properly, process their emotions, and begin to clear their head and work through to a place of healing. (Or…) I’m not emotional enough.ĭid this happen because of how messed up I am? It is very, very easy for that jumble of thoughts and questions to go downhill.Īm I messed up? I’m too emotional. The grieving person has an internal monologue going on. You might not even feel like your words have had any effect at all. You won’t cure their grief, or provide an instant salve for the wounds of their heart. Can anything you say even make a difference? The grieving process takes time and effort from the mourner. Your grieving friend or family member is going through so much right now. Today, we want to explore what the mourner is experiencing and let the reality of grief inform the words of comfort you offer.Īt the end of the article, we’ll have plenty of sweet, heartwarming, and meaningful quotes for you to contemplate sharing at the right time.īut let’s first consider this: Is it really even possible for your words to offer comfort to someone who is grieving? Words of Comfort After Loss But the mourner will hear variations of condolences and sympathy so many times that it almost loses meaning. Sure, those things are appropriate to say, and even need to be said. You have my deepest sympathy on the loss of your father. What do you say to comfort someone who lost a loved one?
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